Willy Savagely Beaten, E Gos Suspected in Viscious Attack!
In a truly sickening turn of events, E Gos has violently attacked Doolies 2nd baseman Ryan “Willy” Williams. This shot was taken moments after Willy was assaulted outside of Torna Pizza on 9th Street in Hoboken. So far no arrests have been made but witnesses have all but convicted Eric Gostissa of extremely aggravated assault with attempt to kill! At 5:42pm EST, Williams was attacked by a 6’1 150lb white male wearing silver Oakleys with neon tinted frames. The suspect was also described to be wearing a sleeveless Gas House Gorillas tee shirt and shouted repeatedly “I’m E Gos the Center Fielder snitches!” No word yet on Williams medical condition, Coach Emmanumonk had this to say, “this is a terrible terrible situation, my own flesh and blood has ravaged my second baseman, and more importantly…friend. Our thoughts are with Willy’s roommates tonight, stay strong Elliot.”
More details to follow, if you have any additional information please post any tips in the comments section of this post.
I believe he was also spotted drinking a Miller High Life, and smoking a parliament. Also thought to have holes in his sock. Yes, just one sock. The other was barefoot.
ReplyDeleteThis is a terrible situation..I heard Willy will be aright for the game though..We gotta come out of the gates fast for this game!!
ReplyDeletei agree, i hope hes ok....will he be ready for the the best team your facing?
ReplyDeleteI've talked to some witnesses myself and i hear he was also wearing cargo pants, a beaten down giants hat, and multiple nike wrist bands on weird, random parts of his body.
ReplyDeleteGood call about the game tho gos, we better come out the gates fast for this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hope they are the best team we are facing anonymous because they are the only team we are facing this week
ReplyDeletewell if E-Gos is looking to significantly weaken the doolies they sure know who to go after
ReplyDeletehey anonymous.......eat a dick
ReplyDeleteIsn't a Doolie a blowjob or something? Are you telling me to give myself a Doolie? I got a younger brother who is 20 years old...initials M.S.
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